Yikes! Yelp! Screech! Ka-BLOOEY! The city lurches back into full swing, with galas, benefits and socialite Lydia Hearst—who recently told The Observer she sees herself as a “Hemingway type”—launching a Holiday Bag for PUMA party at 60 Thompson! Then salt your baguettes, fellas, it’s the FIAF (French Institute Alliance Francaise) Trophée des Arts Gala, honoring James Ivory, the director who has directed many films in France. Mr. Ivory will receive his award from the ageless Uma Thurman, whom he once directed in Henry James’ The Golden Bowl. Then it’s UNICEF’s annual Snowflake Ball—so named after a snowflake that the organization suspends at Fifth Avenue and 57th Street—at Cipriani, co-chaired by Pamela Fiori and Charlotte Moss and honoring Téa Leoni, whom we’re really hating ever since her once-dorky hubby David Duchovny became a smoldering Showtime star. (Why does that never happen to our artsy boyfriends?) And finally, the 2007 Annual Gala for KIDS (Kids in Distressed Situations) features our beleaguered cuddly Governor Eliot Spitzer (when you get into a slimefest with Joe Bruno and Joe Bruno is winning, you know you’re in trouble) along with new View co-host Sherri Shepherd (we give you half a season, honey!) and a massive truck parked outside the Pierre, gathering toys for young California wildfire victims. But surely the golden ticket tonight goes to a band called FakeC/DC, which offers a live burlesque tribute to AC/DC. Our holiday spirit is rising.
[Lydia Hearst PUMA Launch Party, 60 Thompson, 10 p.m.; FIAF Trophée des Arts Gala, Gotham Hall, 212-254-6677; UNICEF Snowflake Ball, Cipriani 42nd Street, 6:30 p.m.; KIDS and Fashion Delivers Gala, the Pierre, www.kidsdonations.org, 212-245-6750, ext. 22; FakeC/DC, Fontana’s, 105 Eldridge Street, 9 p.m.]