Thursday, July 24th

Up in Canada, the burly DNA that produced our first college boyfriend (a hockey player; weren’t those the days!) has inclined some of the populace towards slaughter of baby seals. “What’s interesting is when you meet a bunch of seals on the ice that are just being born, then they have innate character in them, just like young kids do,” said Nigel Barker, Brit fashion photographer and eye candy on America’s Next Top Model, who is spokesman for the Humane Society’s campaign to end this sick spectacle. “Some are precocious, others are a bit more shy, and then there was one that was very talkative and kept on making screeching noises all the time; and it’s just like if you go into a ward of newborns, that’s going to be the case,” continued Mr. Barker of his blubbery friends. “One’s going to have colic, another’s going to be a smiley kind of baby. So it’s very similar. And I think the result is, when you describe it in that kind of manner, humans find it easier to identify.” Tonight Mr. Barker launches a photography exhibit at Mark Seliger’s 401 Projects, which will be decorated to resemble an ice floe—i.e., frozen white popsicles, white faux fur furniture. “If you know animals in general, though they’re strange enough to some people, they’re really not all that different from us in many ways,” said Mr. Barker. We asked him to shut up and come buy us a drink already, but he claimed to be busy: “Tomorrow I leave to go to Martha’s Vineyard to protest the monster shark hunt.” (Likely story.)

[“A Sealed Fate” opening, 401 Projects, 401 West Street, 7:30 p.m., invite only] Thursday, July 24th