Claire moved in with her boyfriend, but soon learned that he was using that same “voice” on some of her friends. They broke up and are now friends—and she’s watched him rebound from one relationship to another.
“He’s not a bad dude, but he just doesn’t know how not to have this over-the-top magical romance which eventually leaves girls completely broken. He’s like a love monster,” she said. “I think this type of guy is more dangerous than the typical one-night-stander because there is so much more emotion and attachment involved that is ultimately more destructive.”
It’s hard to say whether the Homme Fatale’s serial conquests are intended maliciously; most of the women with Homme experience tended to think not, in contrast to the deliberately sleazy womanizer.
“It’s not like he walked around saying, ‘I’m going to get laid tonight,’” said Katherine, the actress. “He was more, ‘I just want someone who’s on my level intellectually.’”
According to James, the Homme Fatale is neither a womanizer nor a sociopath—though these categories might overlap a bit.
“The Homme Fatale is a different, possibly more modern condition than a sociopath—he is not as aware of his actions. My understanding is that sociopaths are more clever and conniving. Maybe this is my personal bias, but I think the Homme Fatale is a slightly more sympathetic character,” said James. “The empathy is there, but people who do the most harm are people who don’t know what they want, and Hommes Fatales don’t know what they want.”
And unlike a sociopath, James described feeling a genuine sense of remorse. He’s been trying to change.
“I don’t think you can ever really shed it completely, but as with any sort of psychological problem, it can be made better,” said James. “The first step to reforming one’s actions is to become aware of the pattern you’ve laid out.”
ialeksander@observer.com
