Half the Internets are taken up with photos and videos of the CUTEST. ANIMALS. EVER. Fuck You, Penguin takes a long, hard look at superadorable puppies, monkeys, sloths, and moose — and tells them, in no uncertain terms, to get fucked.
Needless to say, it’s our new favorite website.
What offenses have these very cute animals committed? Camels are “played out.” Ponies “try too hard,” dolphins are “smug little shits,” and that “duck-billed asshole,” the platypus, is so weird that people can’t even agree on the plural form of its name. (“That’s because if you see two of these animals[?] together, the fabric of space and time will literally tear apart.”) As for penguins, well — they’re simply too adorable to bear.
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