Downsize this, baby! A new group calling themselves the American Society of Shit-Canned Media Elites (ASSME)—i.e., all those who weren’t savvy enough pre-recession to flash some epidermis for the New York Times Magazine editors and land an assignment and subsequent book deal—throws a party at Ella Lounge on Avenue A. “Wow. Um. Yes!” wrote ASSME chief and former Radar staffer Aaron Gell when we inquired (via IM, of course; we’ve cut back on phone use in this economic climate) about whether this was an actual society. “This is probably how the French Revolution got started.” He’s expecting “quite a few unemployed media people from across the spectrum. … I’m seeing a new RSVP like every couple minutes. I never had near this much attention for any actual story I wrote or edited.” Also: “There’s a prominent headhunter who’s planning to attend. I won’t name names to protect her safety.” Attendees are asked to bring a gently used coat for charity: “We’ve heard from quite a few fashion assistants, so we’re expecting some very nice coats,” noted Mr. Gell. Later, two pillars of the vanishing good life, Ralph Lauren and Tom Wolfe, fete photographer Mark Seliger’s new book of rock star photos, Mark Seliger: The Music Book. Even Tom Wolfe can’t resist free drinks and reduced-price spats these days!
[ASSME Holiday Party, Ella Lounge, 9 Avenue A, 8 p.m., RSVP to email@example.com; Ralph Lauren and Tom Wolfe celebrate Mark Seliger, Ralph Lauren, 379 West Broadway, 7 p.m.]