Crime Waves: ‘The Road to Trouble Was Soft, Grassy, and Green’

“For Joseph Bruno,” writes The Times, “Golf Was Central to Politics and Business.”

“And Crime,” they neglect to add.

It seems the golf course (“soft, grassy, and green”) was Mr. Bruno’s venue of choice for unethical activity:

“There must be more golf courses around here than anywhere in the country,” Mr. Bruno’s lawyer, Abbe D. Lowell, marveled last week after yet another witness recounted yet another meeting with Mr. Bruno while playing golf.

For Mr. Bruno, who federal prosecutors say improperly mixed his political and business interests and sought to deceive the public about it, golf provided more than just exercise and a chance to unwind. It also assured privacy, hours at a stretch to bond with clients, and the occasional vacation on someone else’s dime.

Bowling, for example, would not meet these needs.

Meanwhile, former chauffeur James Biear is accused of stealing valuables–including a $220,000 Warhol painting and a book signed by Alfred Lord Tennyson–from Joseph Pulitzer’s grandson. The Daily News says that Pulitzer heir Kenward Elmslie “realized something was amiss” in 2007, but FBI agents didn’t descend upon his sometime driver until Biear’s ex-wife told insurance agents that his belongings were stolen.

But not all crimes involve golf and people with names like “Kenward.” For example: the Post reports that a former city cop was convicted yesterday of drugging a woman at a Bronx bar and raping her in a motel.

And arson continues at Stuyvesant High School, despite the arrest of a student last week. The authorities believe the most recent fires are the work of a copycat. The copycat believes they are the work of a criminal mastermind. Writes the Daily News:

The new culprit apparently thinks he’s a genius.

“I’m smart enough – you can’t catch me,” read a note left at one of the fires, according to FDNY sources. Another note appeared to be in hieroglyphics.

To be fair hieroglyphics are pretty badass.
Crime Waves: ‘The Road to Trouble Was Soft, Grassy, and Green’