Sister Susie sells seashells at the Seashore: Not so simple.

Let’s just say sister Susie was going to sell seashells at the seashore — in New Jersey. Here is what she might have to go through in the Garden State, to sell seashells at our seashore:

  • She'd have to make sure her location in the seashore town was zoned for commercial sales. Also, she would probably have to buy a day pass for the shore, unless the Assembly has its way and sets the beaches free finally.

  • Sister Susie will have to pay sales tax on each seashell sale, and withhold Social Security taxes from any employees.

  • Her business would have to be registered with the Secretary of State’s office as well as the Division of Consumer Affairs. Maybe she should join the Chamber of Commerce of Ocean County or the town of Cape May.

  • If she was just selling seashells at the seashore for the summer, perhaps a vendor’s license would be necessary.

  • She would have to make sure the seashells were not from a species protected under the Endangered Species Act (ESA) as administered by the Office of Protected Resources.

  • If she is your sister, and you have any decision making power over who exactly gets the rights to sell seashells at the seashore, you and she both would be subject to the New Jersey Conflict of Interest law .

  • But, if sister Susie is a Sister at a church, she may be exempt from certain zoning and tax regulations. Also, she may be permitted to distribute for donations for her church the seashells. And her right to distribute seashells might very well be protected by the First Amendment under religious grounds.

  • She might also want to have a website and she would have to register www.sistersusieseashells.com with one of the domain registry companies. Also, she might want to trademark “Sister Susie’s Seashells”™ with the United States Patent and Trademark office.

  • If the seashells are from the ocean in international waters, there might be some intercontinental environmental treaties that may have to be followed regarding international fishing rights. Also, she might want to make sure that the seashells arfe gathered by union seashell gatherers, too.

If any of the above is not followed, sister Susie might be suspended from selling seashells at the seashore. Or sister Susie might have to sue to sell seashells at the seashore.

Anyway, all of this is much easier for Susie than for her sister-in-law Betty Botter or brother-in -law Peter Piper.

It seems that Betty Botter bought a bit of bitter butter that made her batter bitter —-and now she’s in trouble with the Better Business Bureau. And her brother-in-law, Peter Piper, who picked a peck of pickled peppers. Seems it was not exactly a "peck", and now he's in trouble with the New Jersey Weights and Measures. Sister Susie sells seashells at the Seashore: Not so simple.