Snooki to Write Book She Will ‘Undoubtedly Never Read’

“Jersey Shore” starlet Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi will be taking her Garden State experiences and turning them into a memoir, Simon & Schuster’s Gallery Books announced today.

It will be called “A Shore Thing,” and its mission is to reinforce the foul-mouthed and aggressive (but charming) man-seeking personality she has cultivated on the MTV reality show. A statement released by the imprint said the book will feature “big hair, dark tans, and fights galore.”

The news comes two months after a talked-about profile of Snooki ran in The New York Times. Salon, Jezebel and elsewhere criticized the Times writer, Cathy Horyn, for condescending to the “Jersey Shore” character. Regardless of Horyn’s treatment of Ms. Polizzi, we did learn this tidbit about her: “She told me she has read only two books in her life, ‘Twilight’ and ‘Dear John.'”

Snooki will be working with a collaborator on the book, the statement mentioned, and it will be released in early 2011.

Later in the piece, Horyn predicted the appearance of the now-real Snooki book — “which undoubtedly she will never read,” Horyn quipped.

Snooki to Write Book She Will ‘Undoubtedly Never Read’