Broadway Fanatic Glenn Beck: 'Give a Kidney to Go See Spider-Man'

With the myriad problems afflicting Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark, the most talked-about Broadway production in ages, whether or not Julie Taymor’s web-slinging comic-book extravaganza is actually good seems an afterthought. The Observer handed over a cool $142 for a seat at a preview and found the visual design “amazing,” the songs “bland” and the book “overwrought, muddled and often incoherent.” Well then, that’s that.

Or is it? Another preeminent critic of the arts has weighed in on the musical, and he’s giving it a deliriously enthusiastic thumbs-up. Well, fine, Glenn Beck isn’t known for his cultural capital — come to think of it, there is perhaps no one less qualified to comment on anything bordering on art — but when Fox News’ trademark bug-eyed lout decides he likes something, he decides he likes it a lot. And this is endlessly entertaining.

The Atlantic Wire pointed us to the clip, which aired on Beck’s radio show yesterday — though the usually whip-smart guys over there mistakenly referred to the musical as Spider-Man: Take Back The Night. No, Atlantic Wire, it’s not about Spidey getting sexually abused! Fix that one ASAP. (UPDATE: All fixed! They thanked us for the heads up and “scolded” the writer.)

Here’s the Glenn Beck take on the biggest musical of the year. Brace yourselves.

This is better than Wicked!…After you couldn’t get a ticket to Spider-Man and you’ve offered a kidney for it, go see Wicked. I mean, you’ve got two kidneys. Don’t give both kidneys up — go see Wicked before you give both kidneys. But give a kidney to go see Spider-Man. I’m telling you, mark my words, it’s being panned right now, nobody’s saying good stuff about it. I’m telling you, you go buy your ticket — you buy your ticket now, if you’re thinking about coming to New York, because when this thing opens and it’s starting to run, you will not be able to get tickets to this for a year. This is one of those shows, this is the Phantom [of the Opera] of the 21st century. This is history of Broadway being made. I sat next to the casting director, by chance, and I said, ‘You, sir, are part of history.’

Glenn Beck, using his economic expertise to analyze the burgeoning kidney/Broadway ticket trading market.

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Broadway Fanatic Glenn Beck: 'Give a Kidney to Go See Spider-Man'