Mugshot Do's and Don'ts

Do: Smile like you're on top of the world.

Looking more like a Baptist pastor than a felon, former Texas Congressman Tom Delay looks like a million bucks after being charged with money laundering. He still has plenty of reason to smile, since he remains free on appeal.

Don't: Try out your new Rasputin impersonation.

In 2002 Mitchell and his wife Wanda Ilene Barzee kidnapped 14-year-old Elizabeth Smart from her bedroom. Smart was found nine months later, and Barzee was convicted of kidnapping in 2009.

Getty Images

Do: Check your make-up.

Has the "Queen of Mean" ever looks so...hot? It's obvious what Harry saw in her. Those pearly whites really light up this 1988 mugshot, taken after her arrest on federal tax evasion charges. She spent 18 months in the slammer.

Do: Go overboard.

A little flamboyance can prove a useful distraction. Still, despite her udderly adorable appearance, in 2008 Michelle Allen, an Ohio resident, ended up in the clink for public intoxication, blocking traffic, hurling verbal abuses, chasing small children, and urinating on a neighbor's porch, all while wearing this cow suit. But really, who hasn't?

Middletown (Ohio) Police Department

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Don't: Neglect your hair.

Phil Spector was sentenced to 19 years-to-life for the murder of actress and model Lana Clarkson. It's just not a good look.

Do: Showcase your eccentricities.

Who could have imagined that this gleeful and mustachioed citizen would have been in possession of drug paraphernalia?

Do: Look on the bright side.

From his giddy expression, you'd think Gacy was in for a misdemeanor like boosting a six-pack of Tab. But no, as any Sufjan Stevens fan can tell you, the sometime clown got lethal injection for killing 33 men and boys, hiding a good number underneath his floor boards. 

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Don't: Backcomb your hair with a chainsaw.

Nick Nolte looked a bit like a frazzled after his 2002 arrest for driving under the influence. But the Aloha shirt is a nice touch.

Do: Be scruffy, but not too scruffy.

The Transformers star was arrested in 2007 for refusing to leave a Chicago Walgreens late at night. Maybe he just really needed to fill a prescription?

Chicago Police Department

Don't: Attempt to dispose of the evidence by ingesting it.

According to reports, Taylor swallowed an entire bag of cocaine as police approached his car, in hopes of hiding the evidence. 

The Daily Mail

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Do: Look like a goof ball. 

Your mugshot is one instance where looking "cool" can work against you. A dorky expression often reads as innocent. Work it.

Dekalb Sheriff's Office in Georgia

Do: Go out with flair.

On December 11, 1990 FBI agents and New York detectives arrested everybody's favorite gang boss for murder, illegal gambling, racketeering, obstruction of justice, blah blah blah. But they didn't call him the Dapper Don for nothing.

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