July 20th, 2011: That Was Jersey News That Was

July 20th, 2011: That Was Jersey News That Was 

N.J. Court Puts Class Actions Against Junk Faxers On Hold By Faxing All Class Members

A New Jersey appeals court has pulled the plug on class actions against junk faxers by sending out “a mass fax to all class members” to let them all know, possibly violating the law itself. “Awkward, I think,” said, Barry Somerstein, Esq. of Birmbaum Rohe, attorney for the plaintiffs.

The Telephone Consumer Protection Act prohibits the use of “any telephone facsimile machine, computer, or other device to send, to a telephone facsimile machine unsolicited information”. Oddly enough, the law was makes it illegal to “fax unsolicited information unless the parties have a prior business relationship”.

The court asserted in a statement that it had ‘a prior business relationship’ with the class action filers—considering that the plaintiffs had all filed with the court.

“We are looking into this issue,” finished Somerstein, “and have contacted all class members to get their thoughts.” Somerstein would not comment on how he contacted the class members.

One New Jersey Responds to Reform Jersey

One New Jersey, the 501 (C)(4) launched this week by progressives in an effort to serve as a watchdog over elected officials the group says are harming New Jersey families, has no plans to disclose its donor list according to a spokesman for the group, who also refused to reveal his name.

“This in response to Reform Jersey, the secretive fund set up by the governor’s closest allies, and their refusal to reveal the names of its donors,” read the statement issued by One New Jersey.

In response, Reform Jersey commented, “Nyaah, nyaah nyaah!”.

One New Jersey issued a counter statement,”Oh, yeah, well you’re an poopy-head. Reform Jersey started it first.”

In response, Reform Jersey issued the following response, “I’m rubber you’re glue, anything you say bounces off me and sticks to you.”

Immediately there upon, One New Jersey issued a press release indicating they would have a “comment about Reform Jersey’s mama sometime later today”.

More Than 760 Days Since Any NJ Politicos In Combination With Rabbis Arrested For Corruption.

News shocker: It was revealed that it has been more than 760 days since any New Jersey elected officials in combination with Orthodox Rabbis were arrested for corruption or taking bribes. Such an incident is a clear violation of the ‘separation of church and state’ corruption.

The sign above the State House indicated the ‘Number Of Days In New Jersey Without A church and state’ Corruption Incident’ flipped over to 760 for the first time in two years.

On July 23, 2009, Federal agents swept across New Jersey 44 people — including mayors and rabbis– in a decade long investigation into public corruption and international money laundering. In the state capitol, lobbyists and political news reporters were checking Google for updated information—but could find no recent arrests since the summer began.

In other news, former Hoboken mayor Peter Cammarano has been kicked out of Lewisburg Federal Penitentiary in Pennsylvania for attempting to bribe penitentiary officials. “We don’t need that kind of behavior here. If a resident cannot follow our rules, we send them back home to New Jersey, where that kind of activity is tolerated,” said Bruce Gyunderson, Penitentiary Warden.


July 20th, 2011: That Was Jersey News That Was