Saturday: House of Twain

After the stress of diamond shopping yesterday, you ate one too many pieces of left-over pecan pie. You’re looking for some exercise today, but your personal trainer at David Barton is taking the day off. Luckily for you, it’s Mark Twain’s 176th birthday and New York’s Clemens fanatics have organized a two-hour walking tour so you can amble off those calories. You’ll see the sites the great American novelist frequented downtown, from his townhouse to the hotel where he met his future wife. But don’t expect a relaxing jaunt around the Village. Twain once wrote that “there is one thing very sure—I can’t keep my temper in New York. The cars and carriages always come along and get in the way just as I want to cross a street.” Today you’ll pass the same streets, now crowded with belligerent bikers, taxis and trucks, and summoning Twain’s spirit, you’ll curse the cartage just as the be-whiskered writer did over a century ago. By the end of it, your blood pressure will be surging, and those holiday pounds will be melting off.

Mark Twain’s New York, meet at 500 Broadway, 1 p.m.; for tickets, $20, contact Peter Salwen at 917-620-5371 or peter@salwen.com.

Saturday: House of Twain