Tuesday: Rock Out With Your Bonus Out

Although the sun may have set on #Occupy, it seems that Wall Street has fallen on hard times, image-wise. Cutthroat

Although the sun may have set on #Occupy, it seems that Wall Street has fallen on hard times, image-wise. Cutthroat capitalism is experiencing a serious backlash, and your friends at Goldman haven’t been handing out their business cards with the same élan they used to. But, as a realist (who happens to sit comfortably in the 1 percent), you understand that Wall Street isn’t all bad, and as you open your monogrammed leather day planner (just kidding; who are you, Gordon Gekko? You have an iPhone 4s), you realize that tonight’s planned festivities prove your conviction. You’re slated to attend the Wall Street Rocks concert where financial execs get their (four-car) garage bands together to raise funds for veterans. That’s right, Morgan Stanley MDs and Citi traders are going to serenade you with triple A-rated covers. After hearing “Have a Cigar,” “Sympathy for the Devil” and “Money for Nothing,” your gnawing fears about the fate of your finance cronies will subside, and you’ll be two-stepping like it’s Oct. 16, 1987. Don’t think twice, it’s alright—all proceeds will support the injured servicemen and women!
Wall Street Rocks for the Veterans; Irving Place, 17 Irving Plaza, 5:00 p.m. to 3:00 a.m. Tickets, from $15, available at www.wallstreetrocks.org.

Tuesday: Rock Out With Your Bonus Out