GIFs are a wonderful technology. What could be more delightful than the well-timed insertion of the perfect Real Housewives of Atlanta GIF to punctuate your point?
Unfortunately, as with so many lovely things, these wee moving pictures have become rather overexposed. In fact, it’s gotten so bad that the nation’s elected officials apparently now think they’re a great tool for swaying public opinion. Hence this completely asinine piece of advocacy, straight from the official website of the House Committee on Energy and Commerce: “The Roller Coaster of Emotions on the Path to Build the Keystone XL Pipeline.”
It is a chronicle of the history of the ill-fated Keystone XL Pipeline, meant to transport oil through the middle of America, and it is a BuzzFeed-style assembly of reaction GIFs starring Internet favorites like Honey Boo Boo, Jimmy Kimmel and the New Girl.
Christ, wait until Franzen hears about this.
This intellectual nadir even includes this GIF, suggesting there’s a liberal plant among their interns (ya know, since it makes him look like a laughingstock):
This exercise in vapidity has, of course, spurred a chorus of fatuous “So true!” affirmations:
So this is what it’s come to, America. (Though we suppose after the kerfluffle over the Heritage Foundation and the Personhood USA’s BuzzFeed Community posts, GOP types have at least decided it’s safer to keep the listicles to their own platforms.)
But you–yes, you!–can help put a stop to the GIF-i-fication of the American mind. Before you insert any GIF, stop and ask yourself whether doing so will make you look a fucking tool. Does this pitch deck really call for additional Anchorman? Think long and hard, then act according to the dictates of your conscience.
In conclusion, ban GIFs.