You Can Finally Sleep With Your Pretend Cartoon Girlfriend Hatsune Miku Thanks to This Software

It's about time.

Who wants to spoooon! (Photo:
Who wants to spoooon! (Photo:

What is reality, anyway? Nothing more than a bunch of sights, smells, feelings, maybe an interpersonal relationship or two. And what is a girlfriend but a person who sleeps next to you in bed who you can spoon and nudge occasionally, whether she is made of flesh and blood or synthetic material?

Now, lonely people can have their own “real” “girlfriends” thanks to a new app from–where else?–Japan. It allows users to see, touch and even smell a three-dimensional, virtual version of animated Japanese pop star Hatsune Miku, RocketNews24 reports

In the Sleep Together App, Ms. Miku refers to the user as “master” because that’s not creepy, and even says good night. From RocketNews24:

“She will shift on occasion and make small, sleepy noises, and if the user becomes restless, she will open her eyes and ask the person what’s wrong before drift [sic] back into dreamland. If one puts the program on a timer, Miku can even be used as an alarm clock of sorts, sitting up at the appointed time and urging her master awake.”

The developers also include a good old-fashioned dakimakura, or love pillow, which has “the same height and relative size as Hatsune Miku,” despite the fact that, as cartoon, Ms. Miku doesn’t actually have a height and size. The pillow is “quite springy and good for squeezing,” RocketNews24 reports, and we can think of a few other things it’s probably good for 🙁

Strangest of all, the developers recommend that, to get the full sensory effect, users spritz their pillow with a type of a perfume called “fragrance of a high school girl.” Noooooo.

So this is basically a combination of a SleepCycle app and a blowup doll, with an added dose of  longing. Hmmm, we liked the idea of Hatsune Miku more when she was focusing on opening her own restaurants and being besties with the CEO of Domino’s. You Can Finally Sleep With Your Pretend Cartoon Girlfriend Hatsune Miku Thanks to This Software