What Does the Fox Write?

Ca-ching-ca-ching-ca-ching-ca! (Simon & Schuster)

Ka-ching-Ka-ching-Ka-ching-Ka! (Simon & Schuster)

Once upon a time, I took a meeting with a book agent who handled some of my favorite comedians. I pitched him a couple of ideas, to the vein of “Like David Sedaris, but not as funny, and for Lena Dunham money.”

He gently pulled my head out of my ass and told me that no one made Lena Dunham money (except Garth Risk Hallberg, I guess), and if I really wanted to cash in, I would need to write for the YA genre. “Like Twilight,” he said, “but you know, not actually Twilight.” (Though based on the success of 50 Shades of Grey, I could have written actually Twilight.)

What this meeting gave me, though, was the germ of an even better idea: If YA books > actual literature in terms of profit, what if I did even less work and wrote a children’s book? And what if that children’s book was just onomatopoeia-laced lyrics from an already-existing viral video? Urban Outfitters would sell it and I’d make millions!

Too bad some other guy already had the idea. From The Los Angeles Times:

Viral video sensation “The Fox” by Ylvis will be published as a picture book by Simon & Schuster. It will be available in time for Christmas.

It may be the first children’s book to come with “Based on the YouTube Sensation” emblazoned on its cover.

For only $17.99, your children can grow up completely misinformed about the cries of certain canids.

What Does the Fox Write?