Reviewing Artforum’s Advertisements: March 2014

You may recall, loyal readers, the mystery ad from last month's issue (or maybe you don't because you're not insane and have one or two slightly more important things to think about) but it looks like we can close the case on this one. Standard (Oslo) all along. Shoulda know when those strange soccer girls disappeared. —Zoë Lescaze
So the Turner Prize-nominated artist formerly known as Spartacus has a new show at Sadie Coles. I like the ad, however, because it presents the virtual experience of being attacked by a bat. Think about it: are you going to notice the body and all the candles and stuff in the background? No way, you're going to be focused on that horrifying face. Anyway that's what I perceive this ad to be about. Bat attacks. —Dan Duray
If biking in New York feels a bit like being in a video game, biking in Berlin takes it to a whole 'nother breakdancing level. —Z.L.
One of the greatest mysteries in the art world right now is why Mr. Pardo has never been tapped by J. Crew or the Gap to appear in an advertisement. Such great, consistent, understated style. This full-pager intrigues: what is he looking at? Perhaps some of the sumptuous work that appears in his eighth show at Petzel? —Andrew Russeth
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Armory's over, but this ad will remain forever. It's the consistent sepia over two vastly different scenes that really sells this one. Lachaise's statue looks like she's about to slap him on the back and say, "There, there," whereas Bourgeois, well, it seems like she was basically never out of her element, eh? —D.D.
A little known fact is that art is best appreciated through severe licking, and not the usual passive looking all you dummies have been doing. —Michael H. Miller
The font & flourishes are pretty out there design-wise (not your usual sans serif fare), so yes, I do like looking. Scopophilia abounds. —Z.L.
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What can I say? Reminds me of my first kiss. —M.H.M.
Having a flashback to middle school, when I was really into loading new fonts onto my computer to make my papers and websites look cool. This is a cool font, and the clip-art pieces seal the victory. —A.R.
Big Pensato fan over here. I guess this is one of those "Have a Nice Day" smileys. Probably doesn't matter. Her installations often look like her studio anyway so it's kind of thrilling to see this, apparently her actual studio. No more or less mad than you'd expect. She's a pro. —D.D.

Seriously solid stuff in this issue of Artforum: Daniel Birnbaum, on Arthur Danto, Griel Marcus on Inside Llewyn Davis and Alison M. Gingeras on Friedrich Kunath. Plus a conversation between George Lewis and the late, great Terry Adkins. Lots to enjoy. But it’s time now to discuss the advertisements. (Actually it was time for that a long time ago: we apologize for the delay in publishing this.) In the slide show, a look at this issue’s best ads.

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