This ‘Butter Crayon’ Could Be the Greatest Invention of Our Time

It's like lipstick, but for butter

The adorable Chouinard family. (Kickstarter)

The adorable Chouinard family. (Kickstarter)

We know, we know—calling something the greatest invention of our time is an awfully bold statement. But save your judgment until we’ve told you about our latest Kickstarter obsession: the Butter Crayon.

While other people have been busy disrupting important things like mail, therapy and STD testing, one California family is on the brink of disrupting—you guessed it—butter.  

“Butter is awesome,” writes Lauren Chouinard, whose dad, Don, invented the soon-to-be-legendary crayon. “It’s one of the only things that makes food better simply by its presence in a pan or a recipe. However, slippery wrappers, greasy hands, and crumbs in the butter make it as annoying as it is glorious.”

Enter the Butter Crayon, a hollow silicone tube that dispenses butter kind of like lipstick. Instead of spreading butter with a knife, Butter Crayon users can insert a stick of butter into the tube, gradually dispense it from the opposite end, and spread it onto toast or into a pan as easily as they might use, well, a regular crayon.

Here’s a GIF to show you how it works:

BRILLIANT. (Kickstarter)

BRILLIANT. (Kickstarter)

The Butter Crayon was created by Mr. Chouinard, who’s worked at Microsoft and HP consulting on development and design, so you know he knows what he’s doing. The invention was devised out of necessity—Mr. Chouinard was struggling to make breakfast for his family.

“When he found himself making breakfast for the family, from waffles and pancakes to toast and eggs, the mess of crumbs and butter everywhere would make Don’s culinary workspace look unorganized and sloppy,” the page says. Poor Don!

For your convenience, the product’s Kickstarter page lists a number of reasons why the Butter Crayon is superior to “other butter gadgets on the market,” because apparently those exist.

“There are single-tasking butter devices for corn-on-the-cob which have a curved shape where the butter comes out,” they point out. “If you tried to use one of these in a hot pan, no butter would touch the pan and the device itself would melt. Also, these devices do not keep the butter air-tight fresh.”

They also point out that the Butter Crayon is made from “FDA food safe high temperature silicone” that won’t melt when it touches a hot pan, and that it locks the butter in place so that it doesn’t slide back mid-spread.

The Chouinard family is looking to raise $60,000 by Jan. 14. So far, they’ve collected $7,696.

“All of your pledge money will go directly to setting up production, manufacturing and shipping out the Kickstarter pre-orders,” the campaign page says. “With your help, you could very well be seeing the Butter Crayon in every corner drug store, supermarket, and grocery in your town.”

MAKE IT HAPPEN, PEOPLE.

This ‘Butter Crayon’ Could Be the Greatest Invention of Our Time