Let’s Cast The ‘Expendables’ TV Series

A 1966 Batmobile will be on display at the New York Historical Society until February, beginning Friday.
Batmobile in NYC
Andy Griffith
Listen, if TUPAC can perform at Coachella sixteen years after he died, then MATLOCK can still dispense justice on some dudes as an Expendable.
Angela Lansbury
Murder, She Wrote in the blood of the enemies of freedom.
Eddie, the dog from Frasier
Look at that cold, calculating motherfuc*er.
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Terry O'Quinn
Don't tell Locke he can't jump this motorcycle over 30 other motorcycles that happen to be exploding, which I'm pretty sure had to have been a scene in at least one of the movies.
Kitt
Yes, the talking car. No, not David Hasselhoff. It would somehow be less ridiculous to just have the car.
Kiefer Sutherland
Every Expendables team needs that one guy who is a little too into torture, which Mr. Sutherland has proved he can pull off wonderfully.
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Michael Dorn
Yeah, if we could also get him in full Worf costume and make-up, but with zero explanation, that would be great, thanks.
Bryan Cranston
This, because I'M STILL NOT OVER BREAKING BAD.

Deadline reported today that Sylvester Stallone will produce a The Expendables TV event series for Fox, in which a brand new team will band together to save The World/ probably just America. The Expendables, of course, is also known as The Squad of Action Heroes Who Eat Dinner Around 4:30 So They Can Catch Their Programs at 7. They are all old, is what I’m getting at here. According to the report, the TV series will star action heroes from television past, much like the film franchise did with movies.

This means two things. 1) Fox is taking ideas from my Tumblr again, just like they did with Empire and 2) until an official cast is announced, we can all speculate wildly on what TV stars of days past will be filling the awkwardly fitting black shirts of The Expendables.

Now, I know some of these people are technically too old to do this, or maybe even technically too dead, but let’s keep an open mind people.

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