“After years of bullshit and crazy women, I finally got my own place.”
Shoenice, the YouTube sensation who’s proven that shock factor can still get you to the top, has achieved Internet fame by filling his channel with eating and drinking stunts that leave viewers with their jaws on the ground—slamming a bottle of Patrón (14 seconds), a bottle of Everclear (15 seconds), a small bottle of Bacardi 151 (6 six seconds) and four Jager bombs (33 seconds), for example. But for his latest stunt, Shoenice took a break from the booze.
Last week, he uploaded a video to his channel—which has garnered almost 100,000,000 views—in which he gives his followers an MTV Cribs-style tour of his new apartment. It’s hilarious in the typical Shoenice fashion, and especially so because the rooms are all completely empty.
His narration, however, is on point. He spends a while focusing the camera on a ceiling fan, which he keeps calling a “helicap” (According to Google images, a “helicap” is one of those rainbow hats with the miniature spinning blades on top).
A few of Shoenice’s best one-liners from the video:
“Here’s my lease, but I ain’t going to show you that because haters will send me pizzas.”
“I’m doing the Charlie Sheen backwards. I got drunk all of my life and now I’m famous.”
“2016—year of the Shoe, and I’ll always be smoking mad weed.”
Check out the full video here:
We’re not at all surprised by Shoenice’s decision to put the liquor slams on hold. In an interview with the Observer last summer, he told us he was looking to move on.
I’m turning more towards pranks now. I have a camera crew that’s moving from Atlanta to Denver, and we’re going to be the next Jackass. I’m going to do Forrest Gump talks where I start talking to people about the most outrageous things another human being could think of; that’s going to be outrageous. This eating and drinking thing — in the next six months to a year — I’m going to lead that out of my lifestyle.
He also told us about his variety channel and his hopes that it will lead to a feature film.
I also have a Shoenice variety channel. Currently, there’s a 30-minute documentary on there that I hope will be made into a full-length Hollywood movie about my life. I’d like Matt Damon to play me. I think he would make a great Shoenice. Don’t you think he’d make a great Shoenice?
No word on that Matt Damon film yet.