Rob Gronkowski vs. the World’s Best Security Guard Was the Highlight of ‘WrestleMania’


Last night, WWE aired its flagship pro wrestling cluster-butt, WrestleMania, an explosive event that saw an undead wizard enter into blissful retirement, a 47-year-old millionaire come repeatedly close to death for the sake of entertainment and a massive set constructed inside Orlando’s Camping World Stadium so garishly over-the-top Prince came back to life to call it “a little much.” Pro wrestling is great, is what I’m saying here, even if a large part of the Sunday night pop-culture crowd was busy with more high-brow, realistic fare like The Walking Dead.

Pro wrestling is especially great when the lines between real and (sigh) fake blur into a magical stew of absurdity and spandex. Or, hell, on the magical occasion when someone straight up doesn’t get the memo. Case in point: Rob Gronkowski vs. a Camping World Stadium security guard who damn sure deserves a raise.

You may know Gronkowski as the tight-end of the reigning Super Bowl Champion New England Patriots, a frighteningly unstoppable mecha-robot on the field and a somehow more frightening frat star off of it. Last night, during a match on WrestleMania’s pre-show, Gronkowski hopped the barricade to confront an antagonist wrestler named Jinder Mahal. Celebrity guests getting physically involved is practically a wrestling staple. Arrow star Stephen Amell fought an alien. One time a demon monster named Kane tried to kill Pete Rose. These things happen. It’s part of the show…a fact that, unfortunately, no one told this unidentified employee of the damn year:

I love this. I love this for many reasons, which I will list in ascending order of perfection:

1) If you keep watching, you can see a horde of WWE-branded personnel swarm the scene, being all like “yeah Rob, don’t do it, no” but low-key trying to tell the security guard to let him through.

2) That security guard, who I estimate at 5-foot-9 maximum, was so ready to throw hands with a massive NFL tight end. If you’re feeling unsure at work today, be more like the security guard who didn’t hesitate a second to straight truck a man twice her size.

3) No really, Gronkowski flew back like a foot. Every single NFL team should study this brief WrestleMania clip like game film.

4) Good Guy Referee Charles Robinson walking over to pat this American hero on the back and, I assume, tell her she is more of a badass than the entire WWE roster, past and present.

5) Imagining the look on Bill Belichick’s face as this scene unfolded. Rob Gronkowski vs. the World’s Best Security Guard Was the Highlight of ‘WrestleMania’