Kavanaugh Ally Mark Judge Wrote Obama Fan Fiction, Railed Against White Guilt

Brett Kavanaugh's mysterious friend Mark Judge has written for The Daily Caller.

Brett Kavanaugh’s mysterious friend Mark Judge has written for the Daily Caller. Mark Wilson/Getty Images

The drama around Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh has intensified in recent days after two women came forward with sexual assault allegations against him. One of the key players in the case is Mark Judge, who was allegedly in the room when Kavanaugh allegedly assaulted Christine Blasey Ford. Judge claims he doesn’t recall the incident, and he’s been hiding in a beach house in Delaware since his name became public.

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It’s not too surprising that Judge is an expert at dodging the media, since he’s actually dabbled in journalism. He’s written 32 articles for the Daily Caller since 2012 and 2018—his most recent story, a critique of Kanye West, was posted in April.

Many of Judge’s articles are generic conservative critiques of Hollywood. In one, he says studios should stop making movies about Jesus and instead buy his script about U2’s roots in Christianity. Another post centers on Judge writing a novel where Chris Matthews gets killed.

Though none of these stories are particularly well-written, they’re mostly harmless. But then, there’s the post where Judge says celebrities shouldn’t raise awareness about the diseases they have. Instead, they should just “shut up and suffer.”

Judge also seems to enjoy writing weird fan fiction about politicians. In a story called “50 Shades of Barack,” he claimed the president and his creased pants “had some kind of irrational control” over him. “I felt damp below my waist for the first time in years,” Judge wrote. “I was his slave.”

But even the S&M stuff isn’t as bad as the nadir of Judge’s Daily Caller career, a post called “The end of my white guilt.” Yes, it’s as bad as it sounds.

Judge writes about attending the Stations of the Cross on Good Friday in a predominantly black area of Washington, D.C. When he got out of mass, he discovered that his bike had been stolen—so he immediately assumed that a black person took it. A friend told him not to jump to conclusions.

But Judge refuses to treat black people “with a mixture of patronizing condescension and obsequious genuflecting to their Absolute Moral Authority gained from centuries of suffering.”

“Soledad O’Brien, a Harvard graduate, acts like she just stepped off the Amistad,” he wrote. “Black pain is no different than white pain.”

Judge’s service to the Daily Caller was more than racist dog whistles, however. In 2014, he placed a Craigslist ad for a bikini-clad “babe” to star in a video for the site at CPAC (Conservative Political Action Conference).

“We’re poking a little fun at Fox News babes and also at the feminist discomfort with a woman with God-given sex appeal and curves,” Judge wrote in the now-deleted post.

The Daily Caller said it wasn’t behind the prank, since bikinis are “gauche.” And indeed, swimwear shoots are a little small-time for the site. Most of its stunts are more high-profile, especially its $150,000 agreement to send fundraising emails for the Trump administration.

Judge clearly wasn’t privy to such high-profile decisions. But thanks to Kavanaugh, his sordid journalistic past is now back in the spotlight.

Kavanaugh Ally Mark Judge Wrote Obama Fan Fiction, Railed Against White Guilt